Singing in the rain
Spring in Kyoto. Rain. Went out for my first takuhatsu. Four hours of slow walking and long singing. At first, can't help looking at all these legs, long,short, fat,thin, beautiful, ugly, can't help going through the usual movie. And gradually, it fades. Holding the bowl almost at eye level, the black shining surface reflects what is behind and you have a huge flow of passing forms going through you, as if you are getting transparent and porous. Experiences of rejection (not a good idea to do takuhatsu in a shopping gallery, you are always invited out very politely), a lot of teasing, giggling girls and school boys, young beauty queens. A few people coming to you. I could not see their faces but I sense it is mostly women, elderly people and young children ( That I could see all right ). Some would throw coins in a negligent way, some would behave very respectfully, some would speak others would not...My waraji ( straw sandals) are soaked and it takes some time to hold the bowl without huge back pain. When I stop, it's like being born, everything looks different, my mind is very light ( I suppose all these hours of mantra recitation do the trick) and I am ready to start again. Singing in-with-for the human rain.
posted by Taigu at 1:24 AM
3 Comments:
I love your wording.."Invited out"
yes ihave been invited to many places also. Takahatsu was a stumbling block for me, still giving refuge to my little demon "Shu-Ware". I often felt shame in asking for alms after all what was I really doing but sitting and eating and spending time on my self. ahh so easy is it, asking for tokens of gratitude when i'm nowhere to be found.Poor ShuWare searching for a new abode.
Tricky question Anu. Because I was ordained and give my life to zazen, sewing the kesa and I shave my head, yes, you can say I am a monk.
But I am not holy, I enjoy the company of women and drinking wine too much. I have lost job, family and so forth, and I allow myself to drift away like a deluded cloud among other clouds in this bright boundless sky.
How true, Johnny. Bloody hard sometimes, sometimes very easy.
Today, I was invited out of the station by a gentle and very firm man in uniform and white gloves and this chap made sure I was on my way out following the unsui until the floating cloud reached the gate and walked in the rain.
Hard to receive and accept this incredible generosity of people. Eight thousand yen dropped in my begging bowl today, Four thousand bank notes. Just incredible. I am grateful to these people and to those that did not give too.
Hard to remain inwardly still when some make fun and throw jokes at me. I am far from living in equanimity.
And also, again, the fact that what happens is between Buddha and Buddha even if much of the bloke is in the way.
Love
Post a Comment
<< Home